Why cant you just sleep?

Its early..... too early,

Like every single night for the past five months I again have had little to no sleep. Why is it I seem to get the baby who wants to play at night? They say Breastfeeding is going to make him sleep less but you can sooth them faster which promotes sleep. I dont know much about all that except that in those first few weeks before I had really adjusted to the lack of sleep I was NOT being a productive parent AT ALL. Sure my kids were fed and changed and loved but I did not take care of myself.

I learned some valuable lessons about what matters though, and smelling like three day old spit up does not matter in the log run, and hell it serves as a form of birth control in those early months! And that dishes would eventually be done and that my husband can eat stofurs dinners and be just as happy as when he eats the dinner I slaved on for hours....

There are those out there who have decided that we should all just "sleep when the baby sleep" have you ever really tried to sleep when you new born is sleeping and your toddler is not? And on the miracle chance they both sleep at the same time your house may be smelling like the city dump and you haven't showered in a week, so sleep is once again thrown to the way side.

I remember the two worst sleep deprived moments with this baby. One of them came in about week 3.... I was laying on the couch rocking his swing manually because the batteries went dead and I could not drag myself up to change them, then he starts to cry and try as I might he wont stop. after an hour or so of me trying to sooth him I think I just fell asleep..... I slept through him crying three inches from me in his swing and I slept.....

I think that was a very low point for me but it only got worse as time went on, one morning I was up at four as usual and my husband came prancing down the stairs at five all bright eyed and bushy tailed. He smiled and said

"well your up early!"

To which I replied, " No you insensitive bastard I never went to sleep! But you would know that now would you? Go to work! Just go and enjoy the adult human contact!!!!"

Oh yeah those were the days.....

Now though i do get a decent amount considering 6 hours as decent and my two kids more often then not do sleep at the same time during the day. But for those of you still out there getting NO sleep know that this to will pass and sooner rather than later you WILL be able to laugh about it and move on.

Our kids grow so fast and in those early day I say fore the little things like having a perfect house and neatly folded laundry and SLEEP when you can and enjoy your Little baby while he is still so little.

For me though what did work was a mix of co-sleeping and having his pack and play in the room with us within arms reach. I also do breast feed which in those bleary middle of the night feedings is truly easier. I have been on both sides of that one. With my daughter I bottle fed after a few months and it was in my opinion WAY harder to have to actually wake up and find, mix and warm a bottle while she screamed for food. With my son all i had to do was pop a breast out and feed him in bed with us. I am now an AVID supporter of breastfeeding but really do what is best for you and your family. In the end a thousand people can tell you what worked for them but only you can decide what is truly best for you and your child.

And dont buy into the hype of the media based baby books when they tell you to put your infant on a schedule, think of it this way. If you were in a brand new planet with alien and foreign things everywhere and you depended on strangers to feed bath and care for you while you yourself could not speak or move how well would you do on their schedule?

There is a cut off in my house for the no schedule rule though. Around six months when we have more or less established a routine of sorts I do allow a little more rules and a little less winging it. But again this is what I do and for you co-sleeping may work till four years old or never!

AND ITS ALL OK

You are doing the best you can with what you have. Being a mother is the hardest job on the planet! One in which men have no idea about. So give yourself a pat on the back and do what ever you need to do to get to tomorrow with your baby and yourself in one piece.